On blind faith or on manipulation methods in the church
How to recognize manipulation in the church environment and preserve the spiritual freedom granted by God.
Today, on the Sunday of the Blind Man, our conversation will be somewhat unusual. It is about how often the clergy manipulate their parishioners. Of course, usually, this is not done out of ill intent but unconsciously. Nevertheless, it happens.
The fact is, manipulation occurs in our lives far more often than we think. Children manipulate adults by evoking pity. Parents, as they grow old, often manipulate their children in the same way: “I gave birth to you, raised you, stayed up nights…” and so on. We are manipulated by the media, politicians, merchants, and even pets. The same thing happens in the church. But here, we must not allow it because God has given man freedom that no one has the right to take away.
Let me start with common methods of manipulation. The most obvious is the dictatorship of authority.
“I am a bishop or a priest” — and this alone should make my words meaningful and my instructions mandatory. In simpler terms, I am the boss, and you must obey me. In secular institutions, this is called the subordination of juniors to seniors. But the Church is fundamentally meant to have a completely different system of governance. Christ did not come to command and give orders. He came to serve people and, as a Man, showed us this example of service. The Savior washed His disciples’ feet and said that whoever wants to be great must be the servant of all. Christ never forced anyone to do anything, even though He had the right.
The main substitution here is calling “subordination” “obedience.” But obedience is born of love and respect, while subordination is born of fear and hypocrisy. People obey those they trust; they submit to those they fear. If a clergyman lacks authority among his parishioners, he often tries to compensate by appealing to his right of authority.
Appealing to authority is easier than earning love and respect. That is why in monastic tradition the abbot was elected by the brotherhood, not appointed by higher church authorities, as later practices established.
Of course, the main reason for this manipulation is the temptation of power – the desire to command – and the false conviction that one has the right to do so simply because of hierarchical status in the Church. But this conviction is not only false but foolish. People listen to and fear such a person only as long as he holds his office. Afterwards, these people usually end up forgotten, lonely, and unwanted.
Next is manipulation through guilt.
Essentially, this is a continuation of the dictatorship of authority. You do not obey, so you are guilty because you harbor pride and lack humility. And as we know, God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. Instilling guilt makes a person vulnerable and submissive. The guilty person will always be obedient. The most common theme in our sermons is the accusation of sin, i.e. essentially imposing guilt. What should a person feel after such accusations? He leaves the church crushed and often despondent. This is one of the most common manipulations.
Naturally, one might ask, “But what should we do? A priest must rebuke vices, point out faults, and guide people to salvation. Christ also pointed out sins, rebuked, and taught how to live.” All this is true. But first, let us remember that Christ, unlike us, was sinless and had the right to do so. We (meaning the clergy) are sinners just like our parishioners. So, if we rebuke, it’s better to start with: “I speak primarily about myself.” We shouldn’t separate ourselves from our flock. Secondly, and most importantly, rebuke should evoke repentance, not humiliation. If rebuke only leads to a sense of inferiority, it causes nothing but harm.
Unfortunately, many saints’ lives, especially those written in the medieval period, evoke such feelings. Reading them, one might think saints are aliens – insensitive to pain and torture, impeccable in spiritual life, an unreachable standard of purity and morality. And we see ourselves as completely different.
Understanding this huge gap between the saints in their hagiographies and ourselves leads people not to even try to imitate them. Who can preach to torturers about Christ when their skin is being flayed? I had laparoscopic gallbladder surgery, and only the day after could I slowly walk along the wall. You touch a hot iron and scream from pain, but martyrs, when grilled, calmly said they should be turned over because one side was already burned. What should a person reading such stories feel? Sadly, even in modern saints’ lives, editors remove moments showing weakness, cowardice, or faint-heartedness that the ascetics experienced. Yet these are important testimonies that these people were just like us but strove to overcome their weaknesses with God’s help.
Manipulation by fear stems from manipulation by guilt.
Fear is the strongest motivator and the most common manipulation tool. We encounter it from early childhood. “If you don’t eat soup, you won’t grow, and girls won’t love you,” my mother said. “If you study poorly, you’ll end up twisting tails for oxen,” my grandmother warned. I didn’t know why oxen’s tails had to be twisted, but I understood it was bad and to avoid it, I had to study.
In the Church, the most obvious fear imposed by preachers is the fear of losing salvation, perishing, going to hell, and eternal torment. There is a curious category of clerics who are sure who will go to hell and for what. Their competence depends on their personal understanding of Orthodoxy. Reasons for damnation can be going without a headscarf or wearing trousers, having a taxpayer ID code, being married without a church ceremony, the sin of ecumenism, and many others.
Threats of death or illness also fit here. “If you don’t do this or that, you will become sick and suffer.” The same manipulation occurs when a person comes to church with grief or illness, and they are told it happened because of this or that sin. Again, guilt is imposed. We must understand this has nothing to do with the true understanding of God’s providence, which these clergymen have no concept of.
To the experts on eternal damnation, I say: by deciding who goes to hell or heaven, you become small-scale Antichrists. Only God can decide one’s destiny. The Apostle Jude quotes an ancient apocryphal text saying that “Michael the Archangel, when disputing with the devil over Moses’ body, did not dare to bring a slanderous accusation but said, ‘The Lord rebuke you!’” (Jude 1:9). We certainly must not judge others, whoever they are.
Another form of manipulation is manipulation by love.
In everyday life, it’s common. Parents manipulate love toward their children: “I will love you if you do this.” Similarly, wives manipulate husbands, and vice versa. Failure to meet these conditions results in emotional isolation and rejection. When a priest “humiliates” someone in church in front of others, it signals everyone else: “If you want to be loved, meet my demands.” Often, this manipulation works together with the manipulation of authority. A priest may refuse Communion, funeral rites, or other sacraments related to salvation. I recall many years ago hearing an elderly priest say to a parishioner, “I will put on my epitrachelion now and anathematize you.” It’s not the place here to analyze the canonical absurdity of this phrase, but the behavior itself is noteworthy.
I also remember a funny episode from clergy life. A priest in seminary where I studied told how he was taken to a remote cemetery for a funeral, and after that, refused a ride back because it wasn’t on their way. The priest said: “Well then, since I sealed your dead, I will unseal him now,” and boldly marched to the fresh grave with a shovel. The threat quickly worked. Sometimes such manipulation can have a positive effect.
One can also manipulate by exploiting insecurity.
“I finished seminary and academy, I’m a professional in spiritual life, I know everything! So, listen to me and obey.” If you see a professor – even at the best theological academy – who answers any question without hesitation, my advice is to avoid him. If a priest persistently imposes his will and forces you to comply, it’s better to avoid seeking his spiritual guidance.
But on the other hand, manipulation isn’t only from priests to parishioners but vice versa. Sometimes insecurity causes parishioners to shift responsibility for their soul onto the priest, calling it “obedience” to the spiritual father. The priest unwittingly falls into this trap, and a “spiritual guidance” play begins. Parishioners bombard the priest with questions about how to act in all – even minor – life situations, and he tries to solve these puzzles, naively thinking he is offering spiritual care.
In reality, this is a manipulative substitution. The person wants to transfer responsibility to another, calling it “cutting off their own will.” But he does not understand the phrase or what lies behind it. Cutting off one’s will, as the ancient fathers wrote, is only possible before a spiritual mentor who truly knows God’s will! Not guessing or projecting it but knowing for certain. Among the mainstream clergy, I don’t know such priests and have never met one in decades of service. But I have met many young elders (mladostartsy) who gladly participate in this act. They gain a small empire of obedient followers and feel like little emperors. This game pulls in more participants, especially if the young elder has leadership qualities, charisma, and charm.
From my experience, after 30 years of service, I have never agreed to be anyone’s spiritual father and still do not. If someone asks me, I say I can be a counselor or interlocutor, but not a spiritual father. My advice remains just advice, which I give only if asked. All our advice is based on logic, life experience, etc., but this has nothing to do with God’s will, which we do not know! We must be honest with ourselves and others.
Ordination grants a clergyman the right to perform the sacraments with the assistance and prayers of the church community and to voice, during the service, the petitions of our parishioners to God. But ordination does not grant either the virtue of discernment, the knowledge of God’s judgments, or the right to act as a spiritual father.
These are special, distinct gifts of the Holy Spirit, and if you do not possess them, you should not pretend. You should not play the role of a spiritual father; this is abhorrent in the eyes of God. Therefore, each person bears responsibility for their own life before God. And you should not shift that responsibility onto the shoulders of those priests who are unable to help you in this regard.
Sometimes you hear that a priest should give advice not from himself but based on what the Holy Scriptures and the Church Fathers teach. At first glance, this seems correct, but in practice it doesn’t work for two reasons. First, life situations often go beyond the bounds of Sacred History and have no direct analogies or clear answers on how to act in a particular circumstance. Second, even God-bearing spiritual fathers often gave different advice on similar questions because people are different, and God’s providence toward each of them is unique. Here, there is no one-size-fits-all answer to most life questions.
Moreover, I believe that at the level of spiritual life where most of us are, following the commandments of the Gospel and paying attention to the conscience enlightened by prayer and the spirit of the living Sacred Tradition is sufficient for spiritual guidance. The path of righteousness we all strive to walk does not carry complexities requiring special expertise. Everything we need to know is in the Gospel and tradition. Just do it, compel yourself, live by faith, hope, love, and the striving toward God. Walk through life in humility, repentance, and prayerful silence. Endure, thank the Lord for everything, rejoice that you have such a God, love Him and people. What other advice do you need? Everything is in the Word of God. And if a person, having walked the path of righteousness, reaches the path of sanctity, then the Lord will send him a spiritual father suitable for his needs.
One can also manipulate pride and vanity. For example, by speaking about the special chosen status of those present in our church, about their distinctness from those now lying at home watching TV or sitting in a café. And to correspond to this chosenness, one must do this and that. The thing is, a person seeks guarantees. They look for where to sign to be sure they are saved. And manipulators offer these guarantees.
They teach that you must be in the canonical Church, receive Communion, pray, fast, live according to the rules, read the Gospel — that is, collect a certain number of "likes" from God. All this is certainly good and right, but it is not a guarantee. There can be only one guarantee — the constant presence of the grace of the Holy Spirit in a person’s heart. There is no other guarantee. And if it is not there, then one must repent and fear losing God. Because if there are no fruits of the Holy Spirit in the soul, as the Apostle Paul writes, then the higher the hierarchical rank in the earthly church, the fewer guarantees there are, and the stronger must be the repentance and fear.
In concluding the discussion about manipulations, I want to wish my readers not to be blind in their spiritual lives and, with God’s help, strive to discern where you are being helped on the path of salvation and where you are being manipulated.
